I have always had a hard time telling people no. My life is insanely busy based on my inability to utter a word formed by two simple letters. When Jason and I were first married I really had a hard time when it came to saying the above mentioned word. I was always taking on crazy projects, helping wherever needed, and donating Jason when someone needed him. With Jason's crazy schedule and me working full time and having 2 small children our time together was rather limited. Jason found what he thought was a way to help me...he wrote NO on a piece of paper and taped it on the inside of the cupboard door by the phone. When the phone would ring, Jason would open the cupboard and point at the sign. I would always end up saying "yes" and Jason would walk away shaking his head, muttering something about hooked on phonics... I just really enjoy helping others and being needed is always a great boost to the ego and a I forget my own problems when I am busy. I am not neglecting my "stuff" when I tell others yes, I am just adding on to my list of things that need to be done. I do decline my assistance if I really really really can't do what you need but oh it aches to my very core to do so and I try to avoid using the actual "word". So I ask you, at what point can/do you just say no...besides the whole drugs, alcohol, and smoking scene? And does it ever get easier??Until the day comes that I can say "no" with ease, this is what you will hear from me...
"My life cannot implement in action the demands of all the people to whom my heart responds"
--Anne Morrow Lindbergh
Much better/easier...don't you think??!!
no adjective 1) not any, adverb, 2) a word we use to answer a question, or indicate disagreement
3 comments:
Hey Jen, do you think you could help me with... Actually, I struggle with the same type of thing. It's a really fine line for me. I cope with my own discouragement by helping others and it really does take my mind off my problems. I gives me some sort of "high". But, I find my desire to help people can go too far and I have to say no - for my own sanity and the well-being of my family. I love the Lindbergh quote and I think you're doing a great job! If you ever need to practice saying "no" - give me a call.
Oh, by the way, there is a hilarious scene about this same thing in the movie 27 Dresses (though the movie itself wasn't great - it's almost worth watching just for that scene).
Okay, the last picture . . . MY FAVORITE!!!!!!!!! I have finally learned how to say NO to others (not that I always say no), but I want my children to learn that when mom says NO, it means, "NO!!!"
how did i miss this post?! loved it. especially the "no" sign jason posted and then the hooked on phonics comment. giggle snort! i will train you in the ways of saying no---just ask me sometime. it is exhilarating.
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