Monday Memories...

Shortly after returning home with our new baby girl, we discovered that Josh was on the way.  Two babies, ten months apart...I was exhausted to say the least.  One morning, after sending my two older boys off to school, I put Josh down for a nap.  Unfortunately, Hannah had zero interest in napping that morning.  I convinced myself that it would be fine if I closed my eyes for 15 minutes.  I made sure that Hannah had toys to keep her busy and then climbed into bed, laid my head on the pillow, and closed my eyes.  It couldn't have been two minutes before I felt drip...drip...drip....on my cheek.  I opened my eyes and saw Hannah standing next to my bed, grinning from ear to ear, as she waved her magic wand (aka the toilet brush) over me.  

wand  noun, a baton, a rod, a fairy's magic stick

Monday Memories... "Old Yeller"

 
Somewhere along the way I became a yeller.  I am not proud of it.  My kids remind me constantly "Mom, we can hear you.  You don't have to yell".
Shortly after we moved into our home we began to put in our yard.  I remember the day that we were leveling the back yard to get it ready for sod.  Jason was in the bobcat, moving dirt from the front yard to the backyard.  Our two oldest boys were running around the front yard, getting in the way helping, and I was in the house with the babies.  I stepped out onto the deck and I could hear what sounded like a man yelling at what I assumed were his kids.  It sounded like it was coming from the cul-de-sac behind us.  I could barely hear him over the noise of the bobcat and so I walked farther onto the deck and listened again...  Yep, there was definitely yelling going on and I was pretty sure it was coming from the corner house across the street behind us.  I was elated...a fellow yeller!!  I listened some more and could barely make out what he was saying...but it definitely was some serious yelling.  I ran to the front yard and excitedly signaled for Jason to stop the bobcat so he could hear me.

Jason:  What?
Me:  **excitedly**  There is a guy in the cul-de-sac behind us yelling at his kids. 
Jason: Really, what is he saying?
Me:  I repeated a few of the choice phrases I was able to understand.
Jason:  That was ME, yelling at your son, he threw a dirt clod at my head and ran off laughing.

echo  noun, 1) a series of reflected sound waves that repeat as they bounce back from an object, repeating the sound  verb, 2) to reverberate, to reflect a sound back

Monday Memories...

Before I was married and had kids I had a job. I miss that job. It was after finishing the days work that I would discover, too frequently, that I had locked my keys in my car. I would call Orem PD and they would send an officer to the rescue. I just so happened to get the same officer every single time. The first few times the officer gave me a clipboard with a form to sign, and explained that by signing I gave him permission to enter my vehicle and that he would not be responsible for any damages caused. By the fourth or fifth time, the entire process was handled without a word spoken.

Fast forward 1 year...February 1, 1997, our wedding day!! Our reception was absolutely beautiful!! As we were greeting our family and friends I heard a man say "It's you!!" I looked over and there was the officer who had retrieved my keys countless times. He looked at Jason and said "If I had known you were marrying her I would have gotten you a slim jim for your gift, good luck, she'll keep you busy."

A few years after we were married I did it again. That time I called dispatch and said..."will you tell Captain 3 that his stupid wife locked her stupid keys in her stupid car, AGAIN." She asked if I minded if she dispatched it that way...nope, go ahead. Fifteen minutes later my husband pulled up, got out of the fire truck, handed me a clip board...

Monday Memories...on Saturday!!

This memory was brought back when I saw Johnny Cash's "Ring of Fire" on one of my friends blog playlists...I wasn't going to mention names but the memory is so joyful (said with much sarcasm) I must thank her. So to Talya, I send muchas gracias'!!
You are all aware of the non-cooperative body I received to dwell in while on this mortal journey. Six weeks after having Brian I had to have surgery. I have been incredibly blessed with the support of fantastic doctors over my lifetime and I really believe that has made a lot of what I have gone through much more bearable. Well on this particular occasion the head of anesthesia at a major hospital in our area, who is also a family friend of ours, happened to be my anesthesiologist. I was pretty nervous about this procedure, especially now that I had a child to worry about and bless everyone that day who tried to calm my nerves....everyone except this particular anesthesiologist. As they were taking me into the OR he met us out in the hall and said "don't you worry Jen, this is going to be more of a party than anything...we have music, awesome hats (he had on a crazy psychedelic scrub hat), and lots of people to party with". Then as they wheeled my bed through the OR doors I was greeted with Johnny Cash singing Ring of Fire rather loudly. As my friend began the process of knocking me out he too was singing along. The last thing I remember before I went unconscious is Dave's face 12 inches above mine belting out "oh oh oh Ring of Fire". Years later he was again my anesthesiologist for another surgery and I told him if he played Ring of Fire I was leaving...he grinned, knocked me out, and I am positive I heard Johnny Cash crooning away while I slumbered through surgery.

Monday Memories...

Jason and I went to Hawaii on our honeymoon. We stayed at the Turtle Bay Hilton on the north shore of Oahu. It was absolutely gorgeous...the hotel has a private beach and the first night we were there we took a swim on that beach. We weren't in the water long before something bit me several times on the legs and in a very short time I had welts all over. The next morning the welts were driving me crazy...they burned and itched like mad. I warned Jason that swimming was off the agenda for the day and so we headed out to spend the day in Waikiki, planning to shop and wander aimlessly. After a few hours Jason couldn't resist the call of the ocean and so we headed to the beach. Waikiki beach was super crowded and so we wandered west down the beach until we found a spot for our towels. We both changed into our swimsuits and then headed for the water. As we were walking down to the water I noticed several guys watching us and each of them smiled at me when I made eye contact with them. I instantly felt pretty darn good!! I must not look to shabby all pasty white and in a swimsuit!! We hit the water and after a few minutes my legs were on fire (stupid water critters) and so I headed back to the towels leaving Jason to swim. When I stepped out of the water I instantly heard loud splashing behind me. Jason was running out of the ocean and almost instantly he was standing behind me with his arm around my waist, saying "don't move, stay right in front of me". I instantly thought I either had a hole in the back of my swimsuit or some other tragic female event was going on. I panicked and asked Jason what was wrong. He said, "look around, what don't you see?" I looked around and didn't know what I "didn't" see. He repeated himself and again I didn't get it. Jason then informed me..."there are no women on this part of the beach, they are all guys". Sure enough that part of the beach was covered with men, all paired up and looking mighty cozy. I started laughing (Jason, not so much) and thought, they weren't looking at me earlier, they were checking out my new hubby. It was then I fully understood the big sign we saw as we were walking to the water "Queen Beach". No wonder this part of the beach was less crowded. As we gathered up our stuff to head back to the car, a young couple was setting up their stuff about 10 feet from us...looking back, I regret not giving them the 411.

beach noun, a shore of sand or pebbles along a lake or ocean

Monday Memories...

I am at my wits end with my children. On Saturday we were sitting down eating lunch...chimichangas, the kids favorite. Josh was happily eating away when he got this look on his face...we now refer to it as "the look"...we see it frequently and it is almost always followed by some form of destruction. He immediately jumped out of his chair, pushed the chair over to the sliding glass door, stood on the chair and began to "finger paint" on the glass with pieces of his chimi. After the shock and awe wore off and I had counted to ten about 32 times, I cleaned the glass and thought while I am at it I might as well clean the outside of the door also. I stepped outside and began cleaning that side and good old Joshie started to lick the inside part of the glass I had just cleaned...WHY!!!!!! Well the whole event triggered this Monday memory.
When we were little I do believe we gave my mom a run for her money. We really should have been kinder, she worked so hard (60+ hours a week running our family floral shop) and sacrificed so much for us while raising us as a single parent. I remember one day that her visiting teachers were over. My mom was sitting in a chair in our family room talking to these ladies when she happened to glance up at the ceiling. All over the ceiling were the most perfectly round, 5 inch grease spots. She was flabbergasted at what could have caused so many of them. Later, after the visiting teachers had left, she began the interrogation of us kids. "Hey mom, did you know that bologna has a 37 second hang time". So I guess in a way what goes around, comes around.

karma noun, the force generated by a person's actions held in Hinduism and Buddhism to perpetuate transmigration and in its ethical consequences to determine the nature of the person's next existence

Monday Memories...

Firefighters, with the exception of the few whose wives make so much money that it makes a fireman's wage look like paper route money, are known to have several jobs on the side. Jason's schedule used to be that he worked 10 or 11 24 hour shifts at the fire station each month leaving 20 days for him to fill. Over the years he has done a plethora of different things. Firefighter, Police Officer (main jobs), and on the side he teaches Hematology for UVU (UVSC in the good old days), teaches for Utah Fire and Rescue Academy, is a bodyguard (I'm not kidding) and a security officer for a private security company, is on the Utah State Fire Certification Council and is also a Deputy Park Ranger for Utah State Parks. The side job that lead to today's memory is when he worked for UVSC on their medical staff at the McKay Events Center.
I love country music...love, love, love it!!! Alabama was playing at the McKay event center and I so badly wanted to go. Well my dear, sweet hubby had scheduled to work the event and so while he was going to be there I was not. The night of the concert Jason called and asked me to bring pizza down to him and the guys. What a loser!!! He said that I could probably hear them singing from the medical office...if that made me want to kill him any less!! I got the pizza and drove to the college. I walked into the medical office and I gently set (OK, it was more like slammed) the pizzas on to the table and began my ranting and raving. "Do you all realize how lucky you are to be here, you are practically on sacred ground, my lame husband chose to work this rather that take me to see one of the greatest groups of all time...blah blah blah". It was at that point that someone walked up to my right side and put their arm around my shoulders. I figured it was one of the guys and looked to my right and said "what?" in a very sad and dejected voice. Are you ready for this...moment of silence please...it was Jeff Cook!! THE Jeff Cook!!! The fiddle player for Alabama. I was in shock...jaw on the floor shock!!! He had walked into the office right behind me. The guys all started laughing and Jeff (oh yeah, we are on a first name basis) thanked me for the shout out of love and dedication. He then said "stay here for a minute" and walked out of the room...okay medical people give me a bag I am hyperventilating. A minute later Jeff walked back in the room with a backstage pass and a wrist band so I could sit with the VIP family and friends...AHHHHHHHHH!!!!! So little old me had better than front row seats to watch the guys I love perform and then I spent a little time with Randy, Teddy, Jeff and Mark backstage. So what seemed like the worst night turned into one of the greatest...for me...as for Jason and the other med guys, they all received a notice a few days later that all employees were to refrain from fraternizing with the featured guests. Sorry Jason!!!

plethora noun, a large or excessive amount of something, an abundance

Monday Memories...

Soon after Jason and I got married I convinced Jason that we should get a dog. He didn't think the idea was as fantastic and brilliant as I did. I did a lot of research and presented the obvious to Jason... a lab would be perfect for us...they are excellent with kids (someday we would have some), gentle, and on average weigh 60 lbs(not to big but big enough to handle the future attacks of our human kids). A fireman friend of Jason's raised Labs and had a litter of cute little pups. When we went to look at them I fell in love with one of the pale yellow females...she was so cute and instantly fell in love with us. Problem: her little brother would cry every time we would pick her up. Solution: we left that day with a cute little yellow lab and a cute little black lab. Abby and Tyson were our new babies!!!
Shortly after the arrival of the dogs we found out Brian was on the way. When I was 7 months pregnant and not feeling at all good Tyson stopped walking. We found out that he had a severe case of hip dysplasia and would need surgery "yesterday". If it were not for the fact that I was a pregnant, hormonal, and emotional mess I am sure Tyson would not have gotten the $2000.00 surgery and would have been chasing kitties in the sky. You should have seen me when the euthanasia option was mentioned. Tyson had his surgery and when we picked him up the vet told us he would need to remain pretty sedentary for the next 6 weeks..."I'm sorry, did you say 6 'weeks' nice overpriced vet man"..."why yes I did big fat pregnant sick lady". Okay, while labs are gentle they would never be called calm and Tyson was a gentle 90 lbs (60 lbs???) that I was going to have to house indoors and keep "calm" for 6 weeks. I asked the vet for some sort of sedative and he asked "for the dog?" No, for ME!!!!...I swear he actually asked that!
We took Tyson home and set up the house for his recovery. He had one of those cones around his neck and he kept running into everything. The next morning Jason and I both had to work. We set Tyson up in the kitchen on the vinyl floor (just in case he had an accident) and then blocked him in using a piece of sheet rock that we propped up at the entrance to the kitchen...yes lets all take a moment to visualize the event. I left for work...only 3 blocks from our house...with the plan to return every hour to let Tyson out. When I entered the house after the first hour my brain began to process what I saw. There was a foam stuffing like substance everywhere, dirt all over the floor and a hole in the sheet rock blockade. I looked to my right and saw Tyson snoozing in the living room, the couch had a huge hole in the center of it (foam stuffing identified) and my pretty ficus tree was obliterated (dirt now accounted for). I picked up the phone to call Jason and this is how that went...

Brent: "Fire station 3, Paramedic Smith"

Jen: (sobbing) "Bbbbbbrrrrreeeennnntttt iiiiiiis Jjjjjjjjjjaaason ttttthhhhhhherrrrrrre?"

Brent: "Jen, are you okay, are you in labor, do you need us to come to the house."

Jen: (sobbing, now hysterically) "Nnnnnnooo thhhheeeeee ddddddoooooggggggg aaaaate thhhhhhhe couuuuuuch"

Brent: "Um, hang on...(muffled) Jason your wife is on the phone and I think she said the dog ate the couch."

After I called Jason I called the vet and asked why it was not possible for Tyson to recover outdoors. The vet told me we risked the dog getting a infection or tearing out his staples, I told him that currently Tyson was facing certain death (I would kill him with my bare hands or they would have to euthanize him) if he remained indoors and he best write us a Rx for an antibiotic because the dog was moving out to the kennel.
For the next few weeks Tyson went to doggy daycare ($25.00 a day) while Jason and I both worked (to pay for the surgery and doggy day care).

dog noun, a domesticated mammal with four legs that eats meat, a canine

Monday Memories...

Because I have not been the greatest journal keeper I am going to start "Monday Memories" posts. Better late than never...right??? So this Monday will start back at the beginning of the Jason and Jenny story.

Jason and I went wave running for our first date. My mom was opposed to the whole thing..."wave runners are dangerous and I don't want him killing you on one". I reassured her that Jason was a paramedic and seemed to be a very smart, calm, and full of common sense. We went to Deer Creek and headed out on the water. I absolutely love wave running and I think I gave Jason a run for his money. After a few hours Jason asked me to ride with him for a while...I am all about the "control" so I was hesitant but finally agreed. We were screaming around at about 60 mph and Jason hit the wake of a boat. I thought we were headed for the water so I let go of Jason. Well the "we" ended up being "me". I bounced head over feet across the water and ended up getting knocked out. When I came to I was so confused..."why am I in the water and why is Jason sitting on the wave runner with a look of absolute horror on his face?" Jason came to scoop me out of the water asking over and over if I was okay. I am too prideful to show weakness, especially on a first date so I said I was great and we kept riding. Any time we were off the wave runners and walking around I was walking like a drunk woman. I kept losing my balance...clever me had a great excuse..."my sandal kept slipping so I needed to fix it". Jason dropped me off at the end of the day and I was exhausted. I was headed downstairs to my room and fell down almost the entire flight of stairs. It felt so good to finally lay down. The next morning I woke up and had the worst headache of my entire life. I headed to work...couldn't miss because it was a busy day. I was doing the production schedule which happens to be at the top of a flight of stairs. The next thing I remember was feeling like my legs disappeared and I fell down the flight of stairs. I called my mom and asked her to come and take me to the doctor. The doctor kindly informed me I had a horrible concussion and was sentenced to a week of bed rest. I know my mom wanted to say "I told you so" but refrained knowing how sick I was. Jason called every 1/2 hour to check on me and sent flowers, balloons, and visited as often as his schedule would allow. On the morning of day 3 I woke up with a 105 degree fever and I couldn't swallow. I called Jason and he told me to have my mom take me to the ER and he would meet us there. I was so sick I could hardly move. When we got to the ER I dropped into one of the waiting room chairs and waited to die. The door that leads back to the exam rooms was open and I could see a bunch of firemen staring at me and smiling. One of them finally came out and said "you must be the concussion". Ha Ha very funny. They called me back to a room and Jason and his 5 buddies all joined me. The doctor took one look at my throat and he gagged...yes, the doctor who sees horrible awful things all day actually gagged. Well that started the frenzy of "I want to see, let me see, I want to look" from the audience in the room. As each of them took their turn they all stated..."that's the worst thing I have ever seen". Apparently I had gangrene in my tonsils and throat. Because of my fever and being so sick they didn't dare operate to take the tonsils out. They gave me a big shot in my behind...thanks boys for leaving the room for that part...and started me on a medication that I think they use on "House" all the time. If in 2 days I wasn't significantly better they were taking the tonsils no matter what. It took about 11 days for me to recover and to be able to go back to work. Jason was put on probation by my mom...and we both got our wave running privileges taken away. Three years into our marriage we learned that the wave running stunt was also responsible for dropping my right kidney about 2 inches. Jason always jokes that if it weren't for the head injury I never would have agreed to marry him. Silly man, I knew I was going to spend eternity with him the second I saw him!!

concussion noun, a head injury that is the result of a blow or a fall, a shock